I'll grow old - but I won't grow up.

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Does A Lightbulb Shine Where The Sun Doesn't?

You know, when I get a good idea, a light bulb goes on OVER MY HEAD.

Not like this poor sucker/incredible liar. (Oh, and be sure to note the last sentence/ lousy excuse du jour. Yeah, right. And the check's in the mail. My dog ate my homework. She was already naked when I came into the room.)

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Operation Removes Lightbulb From Anus

MULTAN, Pakistan (Reuters) - Fateh Mohammad, a prison inmate in Pakistan, says he woke up last weekend with a glass lightbulb in his anus.

Wednesday night, doctors brought Mohammad's misery to an end after a one-and-a-half hour operation to remove the object.

"Thanks Allah, now I feel comfort. Today, I had my breakfast. I was just drinking water, nothing else," Mohammad, a grey-beared man in his mid-40s, told Reuters from a hospital bed in the southern central city of Multan.


"We had to take it out intact," said Dr. Farrukh Aftab at Nishtar Hospital. "Had it been broken inside, it would be a very very complicated situation."

Mohammad, who is serving a four-year sentence for making liquor, prohibited for Muslims, said he was shocked when he was first told the cause of his discomfort. He swears he didn't know the bulb was there.

"When I woke up I felt a pain in my lower abdomen, but later in hospital, they told me this," Mohammad said.

"I don't know who did this to me. Police or other prisoners."

The doctor treating Mohammad said he'd never encountered anything like it before, and doubted the felon's story that someone had drugged him and inserted the bulb while he was comatose.

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Wow, first he’s sentenced to four years in the joint for making moonshine, then he mysteriously wakes up one morning to find a GE 75-watt special inserted in his nether regions? Maybe he needs to quit sampling his home brew so much…

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