Weekend Weather Warriors
You’ve got to love local Sioux City news. Or maybe not.
You’d think that since we’re the 198th largest TV market in the United States, we’d be able to attract a little bit of on-air talent, wouldn’t you?
I mean, we’re the part of the world where every single politician running for President will soon start dumping millions of bucks on ads, trying to convince a stubborn farmer and his fat-ass wife to put down the cigarettes and generic beer for one evening and go out to vote in the caucus.
But as it currently stands, Sioux City local TV news is really fairly pathetic. Perfect example:
Saturday night I’m flipping channels, watching the evening local news. We were supposed to get some serious amounts of snow that evening (which we did), and I was hoping to see what the local forecasters had to say about it.
Anyway, on Saturday night the weekend kid weatherman read his little script, predicting that the snow would begin falling that evening, and would continue though Sunday.
He then tossed it back to the Frumpy Housewife anchor, who smiled and asked this poor kid the following question:
“So...can you tell us why it only snows on the weekend?”
Um...
While it is indeed true that it has only snowed on either Saturday or Sunday lately, does she really expect a 20 year old to have the magical answer to why God has decided to bless us with snow showers only at the end of the week?
I wish he’d given her back a really good smart-ass answer, but he just laughed goofily and said, “Uh – I don’t know.”
No, no, no. Wrong answer! He should have said (take your pick):
a) It’s because I prayed to an evil demigod for it.
b) What do you care – it’s football playoff season!
c) Two words: Global Warming!
d) Why, that’s when the magical snowflake fairies wake up and sprinkle the clouds with happy dust!
e) Just shut up and just read the script, dingbat.
So enjoy the dry weather while you can – because you have 5 more days until the local news will let it snow again.
You’d think that since we’re the 198th largest TV market in the United States, we’d be able to attract a little bit of on-air talent, wouldn’t you?
I mean, we’re the part of the world where every single politician running for President will soon start dumping millions of bucks on ads, trying to convince a stubborn farmer and his fat-ass wife to put down the cigarettes and generic beer for one evening and go out to vote in the caucus.
But as it currently stands, Sioux City local TV news is really fairly pathetic. Perfect example:
Saturday night I’m flipping channels, watching the evening local news. We were supposed to get some serious amounts of snow that evening (which we did), and I was hoping to see what the local forecasters had to say about it.
Anyway, on Saturday night the weekend kid weatherman read his little script, predicting that the snow would begin falling that evening, and would continue though Sunday.
He then tossed it back to the Frumpy Housewife anchor, who smiled and asked this poor kid the following question:
“So...can you tell us why it only snows on the weekend?”
Um...
While it is indeed true that it has only snowed on either Saturday or Sunday lately, does she really expect a 20 year old to have the magical answer to why God has decided to bless us with snow showers only at the end of the week?
I wish he’d given her back a really good smart-ass answer, but he just laughed goofily and said, “Uh – I don’t know.”
No, no, no. Wrong answer! He should have said (take your pick):
a) It’s because I prayed to an evil demigod for it.
b) What do you care – it’s football playoff season!
c) Two words: Global Warming!
d) Why, that’s when the magical snowflake fairies wake up and sprinkle the clouds with happy dust!
e) Just shut up and just read the script, dingbat.
So enjoy the dry weather while you can – because you have 5 more days until the local news will let it snow again.
posted by Tommy G at
9:14 AM
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