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There are some jobs in this world that just amaze me. Jobs that just make you want to scream “Good Lord! People actually get paid good money for doing that???” And no, I’m not just talking about “acting” on The O.C.
It’s “jobs” like professional skateboarding that impress me. Professional poker player is a good one, too. Or what about a professional BBQ rib-cookoff contestant? These vocational choices all have one thing in common: some lucky bastard was able to successfully turn their weekend hobby into a paying career.
And now there’s another one to add to this list. The following was posted this morning on EOnline’s news page:
GOT GAME: Professional video gaming coming to cable later this year, with USA Network planning to air seven one-hour episodes featuring the pro gamer circuit and its star competitors.
Professional video game players. Dammit – where were these jobs when I was 12? I would’ve so totally ruled!
(Side note: Can you imagine the look on a career counselor’s face when he/she finds out that playing Sega is now a paying job; one that probably pays considerably more than what junior high career counselors make? The bars will be packed this afternoon at about 3:15, that’s for sure.)
I actually knew a guy years ago who was a pro game player for Nintendo in Redmond, WA. I’m not sure if it still works this way, but it was his job to sit around and master all of the new Nintendo games, inside and out, and look for any possible glitches or bugs. His “on the job training” consisted of 40 hours a week of non-stop Super Mario Brothers. I’m not sure if the perks of the job included Twinkies and Jolt Cola or not, but I’m hoping they at least gave him adequate breaks for re-adjusting his eyes to daylight.
I don’t play many video games anymore, but there was a time in my life when my Atari 2600 was my greatest friend. Who needed human interaction when your buddies Defender and Asteroids were waiting for you? We used to proudly go around school showing off the huge blisters on the side of our thumbs from holding the joystick too hard. It was a scar of pride – a battle wound, of sorts. Kids bragged about their high score in Pitfall as if it was the same as winning an Olympic medal. They couldn’t tell you who the President of the United States was, or what the correct change from a $5 bill for a $3.65 purchase would be, but by God they could tell you the exact jump sequence in Frogger for maximum points on level 4. It was Heaven for the 4-foot 6-inch crowd, let me tell you.
But like I said, I’ve given up my video games -- mostly. Oh, I do still have a couple on the computer I play every now and then. The Lovely Mrs. G. and I like to play this dumb game called “Luxor”, which we’ve nicknamed “Balls”, and given the opportunity, I’d be more than happy to kill several hundred mutant Doom monsters if called upon to save the universe.
But now that I know that there’s actual prize money on the line for playing games, perhaps I should head back to “the gym” (i.e. basement) and reinvent my skillz? All it’d take is isolating myself from civilization for a month or two, about $10,000 worth of gaming equipment, and a two-liter bottle of Dew and regular deliveries from Dominos to put me back in the game…
…or perhaps instead I should just suck it up, admit that I’m 40 years old, and remember that I have a mortgage and car payment to make. Because as much fun as video games are, having to live in a cardboard box (alone, I’m sure) because I’ve neglected my husbandly/fatherly/working stiff duties to play Donkey Kong 24/7 would suck. Tremendously suck.
So game over for Thomas - but that’s okay. Because somewhere out there in this big, bad, cruel world, there’s some poor kid who needs to have a mystical Dig-Dug tutor to help him pick up his life and make something of himself. And I’ll be there, ready to dole out useful hints, tips, and the occasional Hostess snack cake.
It’s the least I can do for $.25 cents.
It’s “jobs” like professional skateboarding that impress me. Professional poker player is a good one, too. Or what about a professional BBQ rib-cookoff contestant? These vocational choices all have one thing in common: some lucky bastard was able to successfully turn their weekend hobby into a paying career.
And now there’s another one to add to this list. The following was posted this morning on EOnline’s news page:
GOT GAME: Professional video gaming coming to cable later this year, with USA Network planning to air seven one-hour episodes featuring the pro gamer circuit and its star competitors.
Professional video game players. Dammit – where were these jobs when I was 12? I would’ve so totally ruled!
(Side note: Can you imagine the look on a career counselor’s face when he/she finds out that playing Sega is now a paying job; one that probably pays considerably more than what junior high career counselors make? The bars will be packed this afternoon at about 3:15, that’s for sure.)
I actually knew a guy years ago who was a pro game player for Nintendo in Redmond, WA. I’m not sure if it still works this way, but it was his job to sit around and master all of the new Nintendo games, inside and out, and look for any possible glitches or bugs. His “on the job training” consisted of 40 hours a week of non-stop Super Mario Brothers. I’m not sure if the perks of the job included Twinkies and Jolt Cola or not, but I’m hoping they at least gave him adequate breaks for re-adjusting his eyes to daylight.
I don’t play many video games anymore, but there was a time in my life when my Atari 2600 was my greatest friend. Who needed human interaction when your buddies Defender and Asteroids were waiting for you? We used to proudly go around school showing off the huge blisters on the side of our thumbs from holding the joystick too hard. It was a scar of pride – a battle wound, of sorts. Kids bragged about their high score in Pitfall as if it was the same as winning an Olympic medal. They couldn’t tell you who the President of the United States was, or what the correct change from a $5 bill for a $3.65 purchase would be, but by God they could tell you the exact jump sequence in Frogger for maximum points on level 4. It was Heaven for the 4-foot 6-inch crowd, let me tell you.
But like I said, I’ve given up my video games -- mostly. Oh, I do still have a couple on the computer I play every now and then. The Lovely Mrs. G. and I like to play this dumb game called “Luxor”, which we’ve nicknamed “Balls”, and given the opportunity, I’d be more than happy to kill several hundred mutant Doom monsters if called upon to save the universe.
But now that I know that there’s actual prize money on the line for playing games, perhaps I should head back to “the gym” (i.e. basement) and reinvent my skillz? All it’d take is isolating myself from civilization for a month or two, about $10,000 worth of gaming equipment, and a two-liter bottle of Dew and regular deliveries from Dominos to put me back in the game…
…or perhaps instead I should just suck it up, admit that I’m 40 years old, and remember that I have a mortgage and car payment to make. Because as much fun as video games are, having to live in a cardboard box (alone, I’m sure) because I’ve neglected my husbandly/fatherly/working stiff duties to play Donkey Kong 24/7 would suck. Tremendously suck.
So game over for Thomas - but that’s okay. Because somewhere out there in this big, bad, cruel world, there’s some poor kid who needs to have a mystical Dig-Dug tutor to help him pick up his life and make something of himself. And I’ll be there, ready to dole out useful hints, tips, and the occasional Hostess snack cake.
It’s the least I can do for $.25 cents.
posted by Tommy G at
9:37 AM
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