Failure to Keep Your Lunch Down

The Time: This past Sunday afternoon, approximately 4:00 PM CDT.

The Place: "Casa Del Gressel"

The Event: The Lovely Mrs. G. and I sit down to watch the DVD of “Failure to Launch”, a tale of romantic comedy hijinks starring the masculinely hunky (and I mean that in a purely hetero way) Matthew McConaughey and the vivaciously hot Sarah Jessica Parker.

The Warning: Before the movie started, up popped one of those Motion Picture Association of America screens, informing us that the following movie was rated PG-13 by the MPAA for Language, Sexual Content, and... Partial Nudity.

Wish #1 (from Mrs. G.): “Whoo-hoo! Partial nudity! I hope it’s Matthew McConaughey! "

Wish #2 (from yours truly): “Whoo-hoo! Partial nudity! I hope it’s Sarah Jessica Parker!"

The Ugly Truth: Turns out it was Terry Bradshaw’s backside.

Revulsion #1 (Mrs. G’s): “WHAT? THAT’S IT? Aw, what a rip off!!”

Revulsion #2 (Mine, as I consider bleaching my eyes to burn out the image of Terry’s old saggy ass): “Oh, I didn’t need to see that!”

Moral of the Story: Be careful when you choose to mock the warning signs. You might get it in ways you’d rather not remember.