Staring Into The Sun

Those were some pretty amazing photos online today from the solar eclipse that passed through South America and the Middle East this morning, weren’t they?

Of course, what’s Rule #1 of any decent solar eclipse? DO NOT stare into the sun, if you know what’s good for you.

But you know everyone does it. Hell, I would.

They used to really try to freak us out about the dangers of looking at the eclipse. Whatever you do, no matter what, for the love of God don’t even glance at the eclipse! Why, it’s worse than looking at the contents of Indiana Jones’ Ark of the Covenant – your face will melt off or something!

But what can you do? It’s like someone telling you not to scratch a mosquito bite. Instinctively, you’ll scratch.

How can you not stare into the eclipse? It’s not like one happens every other Sunday – these are rare occasions, and nobody wants to miss it, even if it does lead to potential blindness and/or other social ills.

I remember being in 8th grade when a solar eclipse happened to pass over Seattle; all week long we were warned over and over and over again not to stare into the eclipse. We were given instructions for making a pin-hole viewing box, where you’d poke a small hole in a shoebox, and then look at the eclipse’s shadow or some crap like that. Ooooh, thrillsville.

Anyway, the time finally came for the eclipse – it was about 9:30 AM or so – and half of the school was hiding in the basement, just in case the darkness was truly a sign of the apocalypse or something evil like that. Fortunately, my science teacher felt it was important that we have a chance experience the eclipse up close and personal, so he snuck us all out the school’s back door to see it for ourselves. (Obviously, this was back in the days before everyone was so damn sue happy. No teacher would dare pull such a stunt today.)

So outside we went, to see the eclipse. But keep in mind that this was Seattle, which meant that it was OVERCAST! Yes, the biggest astronomical event of the year was officially blocked by Seattle’s usual crappy weather.

But it did get dark – sort of. Seattle wasn’t in the direct path for total eclipse coverage, so it ended up being more like dusk for a few minutes. The birds sang loudly, the street lights came on, and that was about it. We couldn’t see a damn thing through the clouds. Talk about having it rain on your parade...

So for those of you lucky enough to experience the eclipse today, remember: no staring into the sun, if you know what’s good for you. Wink, wink. Sure, your retinas may be burned out, or you might see the hidden secret behind the eclipse (lottery numbers, Greek Gods, Viking warriors, and/or a Klingon warship), but either way you’ll have a memory you’ll never forget.

And quite possibly an image burned into eyeballs forever and ever. Unless of course you’re a 13 years old smart-aleck living in the soggy Pacific Northwest, that is. Then you’re more likely to get rain water in your eyes than fried corneas.